Today as I was walking to class, there were lots of Guardia Civil guys (police) everywhere around the university - as it turns out the Prince of Spain was coming to Salamanca University today. I have no idea why or exactly where, but noone could go within a certain perimeter. I found it very interesting. The Prince is the heir to the throne of the kingdom of Spain, which is a very important role here. In Britain we have become accustomed to seeing the King of a modern country as simply a symbolic figurehead, but the King of Spain is far more than that - as recently as 1980-something he personally stopped a coup led by a colonel who held the Spanish parliament hostage for over 24 hours. He also confronted President Chávez on television, asking him '¿Porque no te callas?' or 'Why don´t you shut up?'. King Juan Carlos I was nominated by dictator Francisco Franco himself but has interestingly turned out to be perhaps the most consistent supporter of democracy in the recent political development of Spain. King Juan Carlos I speaks Castillian (what most call 'Spanish'), Catalán (an indiginous language of the Eastern edge of Spain) and Portuguese, including the language Gallego, which is said to be a variation of Portuguese and belongs to the region of Galicia in Northwestern Spain. The King is revered within the country by most as a just and formidable leader, and since he is growing old (very recently turning 74), the country will soon enough be handed over to his son, Prince Philip - who happened to be visiting Salamanca today. There is a lot of question whether or not he´ll be able to do as well as his father at leading the country, but we´ll only know when he takes the reign(s).
This morning I also went to a café called El Café Don Quixote. I had some coffee relatively cheap at €1.10, which turned out to be many times stronger than I´m accustomed to. Thereafter I was wired as I don´t remember having been in a while - there must have been enough caffeine in that cup to kill a small woodland animal. My body ordinarily can accept caffeine without any unnatural effects, many times without any extra energy either - which can be disappointing. Not so this morning, all through art class, I could not stop moving or asking questions or drawing like a madman. Nor through siesta could I sleep at all, which is incredibly unnatural. So during my siesta time I watched a video on my iPod, a movie called Waking Life. I hadn´t watched it in a long time and it asks lots of philosophical questions and discusses lots of subjects:
What is the difference between waking and sleeping life and how does it blur?
The character in the movie described how there is some mental mechanism that distinguishes between a mental thought entity of something and an actual extra-personal entity of 'reality' so that we are not frightened by our ideas like we would be of a real hungry lion right in front of us. But when we sleep, this mechanism is suppressed so that we can actually believe that something is happening while we are sleeping. I am kind of alienated off the bat simply because I never really remember my dreams except for once every rare rare rare blue moon, which is to say I only remember dreaming 4 or 5 times. Ever. So I´ve had about as much experience in the dream world as I´ve had in political affairs of Japan. So it makes me curious to consider the idea of this lucid dream world, I must satisfy myself with daydreaming, which I suppose I tend to do often. But my lack of dreaming makes me wonder if I simply actually don´t remember it, which wouldn´t surprise me, or if I simply don´t dream. I wouldn´t be able to tell.
Can existentialism, or self determination, deliver us from the eternal mechanics of prepackaged function?
This last semester I took a class which ended up being 90% discussion on Free Will. So it looks like each of us have histories and influences that have determined the majority of our lives and unless we can decide that at any point we made decisions that were spontaneously and independently invented by us to the determination of our future decisions, we are just results of previous actions. What can occur to us is that perhaps it´s a state of mind? Existentialism is the idea that we each create our own humanity, future and state of being - our essence. How can we all of a sudden decide to brush aside our influences, well we can´t, but we have to take into account this interesting thing we call the mind or spirit. It´s such a non-physical entity, the causal laws of the physical world, one supposes, don´t necessarily have to apply to it. So in the case that we have an intangible mind possibly indenependent of the causal strains that apply to our limited corporeal selves, we can determine our own lives and futures, and thus take responsibility for our own lives. This is my impression of Existentialism, and sounds reasonably good to me.
So what does this mean to meaning in our lives - we go about our business, we love, we work, we play, we consume... where is the humanity and meaning? Can we just live for the sake of living, or does the have to be some meaning to our existence? Personally I have come to be of the opinion that the meaning of life is to love and be loved in return - thank you Moulin Rouge. What is love, you may ask? Humanity itself. Not the physical act of living, but the happiness derived from experience and perspective of a community and outsiders. What can we achieve in our lives but to understand more about ourselves and the people around us and be happy? Some people seek happiness only in themselves, how happy do they turn out to be? Some people seek only the happiness of others, which some exalt that - unless you personally derive pleasure, what kind of life is that either? There is a balance, and the important part is the passion and all-consuming interest and almost physical need that extends outside the self. The most recent experience I´ve had of this was to visit Caroline - I found such fulfillment in being able to relate to someone in a complete and wordless way. It was what I understand to be a familial love, to happily give freely without necessarily wanting. To have been able to relate to her feeling of international isolation while at the same time enjoying the new experience of being there and seeing those things - not to mention hearing and speaking new things. What made it complete to me was to be able to cook for Caroline and her family. You all know about me that I have a compulsion for cooking and food, it perhaps goes a little beyond obsession into a sort of addiction that can be fulfilled healthily and I arguably selflessly. Actually selflessly isn´t correct because I get so much gratification out of cooking for someone. But it was that moment that Caroline and I sat down to the barbequed chicken and seeing her host Madre cheerfully bite into the spinach salad that I could see the meaning of my life. Everything happened in that moment - innovation, discovery, understanding, acceptance, love, friendship, happiness, freedom, reason. What´s the meaning of your life?
p.s. this is a two-way informational medium, I welcome responses and arguments alike
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Fascinating subject at the end there, and one which I have thought about quite a bit recently. There's actually a great quote by my Advisor/Composition teacher, John Hilliard, which I think sums up how I think and feel pretty well:
"There are two things that can be done in this world: give beauty to others and to love. And in the wonderfully ironic twist of metaphysics, doing these things selfishly fulfills us better than does the accumulation of wealth and power."
In that last paragraph, I could get a very clear sense of this sentiment. It wasn't so much the actual cooking as the sharing of the experience that was meaningful. Being with old friends again and sharing your passion with new acquantainces. Finding out what you want in life, I think, is about finding something that you enjoy AND that brings happiness to other people. And I believe that it's sharing your passion with others, as opposed to just the act or job itself, that's where the real feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction lies. For example, I can't really claim to enjoy the physical act of writing music. In fact, it usually drives me crazy. But, it's being able to share that music and those ideas with other people that gets me up in the morning. I don't write music for myself, I write so that I can share something meaningful with someone else through music. I had a professional composer once tell me "Forget rules; write music that you love. Because if it means something to you, chances are that it's going to mean something to someone else, too". So that's my take on not just music but life in general - if you're doing something that genuinely means something to you, you'll be able to reach other people as well.
Apologies for the inherent corniness, but there's my two cents. ;)
Dearest Kip,
After extensive procrastination, I have decided to respond to your blog. First off, I'd like to say that I find my response to the aforesaid blog to be redundant and pointless, seeing that I can converse with you day in and day out here in Spain. Nonetheless, for writing's sake and for the pleasure/annoyance of the strangers that also enjoy your blog, I will do my best to write a heartbreaking work of staggering genius*. (Though I intend on falling short of this goal immensely).
P.S. I refuse to proofread, edit or reread anything I write in an effort to put all my faith in my torrential rivulets a.k.a. stream of consciousness. So apologies for poor grammar and misspellings.
So here we go!
"What is the difference between waking and sleeping life and how does it blur?"
Now, after seeing "Waking Life" several times, I would substantiate that the difference between waking and sleeping life is nothing more than a matter of choice.
But first, in order to determine the difference between these two "worlds" we must first set the parameters in which these worlds exist. In my own words, "waking life" is a metaphor for the reality in which we live everyday. This reality is bound by such constraints as the need to live. That is to eat, drink, and sleep. Furthermore, we also tend to have the instinct to bring others into this reality, (to propagate). Though this is not a necessity for survival, it is interesting to point out that, as social beings, we seem to have the need to share our experiences within this "reality" with others, almost as a verification that this "waking life" does actually exist. If one person imagines a unicorn, he's crazy, if four people see the same unicorn, they're suffering from social-paranoia delusional disorders or psychosis, if the whole world imagines the same unicorn and it’s a reality, whether or not it is actually there, so to speak.
Some more parameters of "waking life" would be the hodgepodge restraints of physical phenomena like gravity, our senses, and all things generally accepted to be true for the masses, i.e. apples are red, Hitler was the first demagogue to use mass media to control the masses, handy was a skinny lil saint etc...
As for the parameters of our "sleeping life" or non-reality, the only parameter is that there are no parameters. (Like FDR and fear, but much sweeter to the mental tongue). The interesting thing about "sleeping life" is that it is not the opposite of the previously mentioned reality or "waking life". This is where my rant will become truly jumbled, but if you manage to follow, you'll at least get my point. Sleeping life encompasses all that exists inside of reality and everything outside of it as well. It is everything that can possibly exist, but at the same time, it does not actually exist in the same sense as our reality. An even more interesting fact is that the bridge between these two worlds, which are in fact in the same place, is in our minds. For our reality, our minds act as the filter through which all interpretations of our senses are cleansed and processed, and it is in our minds that we can interpret the alter-reality of "sleeping life" usually done best, when actually sleeping. It's interesting to see how our minds interpret our reality and translate it into our "sleeping life" every night we sleep. Somewhere along the bridge between these two worlds, an entire mix of suppressed thoughts, unrecognized observations and memories, imagination, and a splash of subconscious converge and are filtered into our "sleeping life". This is why in our "sleeping life," anything is possible. Unlike the "waking life" in which our lives seem to be bound by those mundane parameters of survival, this new filter within our minds, this new lense processes our everything into a world without parameters, our "sleeping life".
If I may quote the movie, "The trick is to combine your waking rational abilities with the infinite possibilities of your dreams. Because, if you can do that, you can do anything". Guy Forsyth is speaking of lucid dreams: dreams in which we our able to control the reality of our "sleeping life". There is a school of thought, that through meditation, and practice, one can continuously dream lucidly every time they succumb to sleep. If this is possible, then the matter of what is the difference between our waking life and sleeping life can be called into question. (This is where I finally make my point that I stated in the very first sentence). If a man becomes obsessed with his reflection in a mirror, then the world within the mirror and all that exists in it, he may no longer be able to decide which side of the mirror he is on. The same can be said about waking life and dreaming life. In essence, it is possible to say that our "waking life" is nothing more than a lucid dream that has only been partially realized. Henceforth, the matter of how to realize the difference between the lucid dream of our "sleeping life" and the lucid dream of our "waking life" must be determined. I personally have not yet discovered how to determine whether or not I am awake in my "sleeping life" or asleep (that is half-enlightened) that I am dreaming in my "waking life". This is why; I believe that the difference truly comes down to choice. If you can choose that this world in which you are reading this blog response is nothing more than the lucid dream inside your "waking life", then by all means, I give you permission to fly away right now or do whatever your heart desires. But if you cannot make this choice a reality, like me, than I guess you’re subject to read the last little bit of this blog response, (though only if your heart desires, as well hehe). I personally have not realized which side of the mirror I am on. I do feel those parameters of the "waking life" right now, but I am not sure if they're nothing more than an illusion created through the filter of my mind. I may be sleeping, and just pretending to be awake for my subconcious's fancy. Anyhow, if you do decide that there is in fact no difference between these two worlds of "sleeping life", and "waking life", that they exist as one reality on the same plane, than by all means, tell someone: tell Dustin Hoffman and Mark Wahlberg, tell the Buddha, and anyone else you think should know, and please tell me. Whatever it is that you are putting in your mental and spiritual coffee to be the God of your reality, please tell someone. Because, as I mentioned before, though all of these parameters of our "waking life" may just be an illusion of our mind, I still feel the need to be social and to share my experiences with other people, and this need may be the one combining link that will truly melt the wall between our waking and sleeping life, once and for all.
These are my thoughts, and I apologize that I am not as concise or eloquent as Mr. McCharen,
Dane
P.S. Below is my favorite quote from "Waking Life".
"A thousand years is but an instant. There's nothing new, nothing different. The same pattern over and over. The same clouds, the same music, the same insight I felt an hour or an eternity ago. There's nothing here for me now, nothing at all. Now I remember. This happened to me before. This is why I left. You have begun to find your answers. Although it will seem difficult, the rewards will be great. Exercise your human mind as fully as possible, knowing it is only an exercise. Build beautiful artifacts, solve problems, explore the secrets of the physical universe, savor the input from all the senses, feel the joy and sorrow, the laughter, the empathy, compassion and tote the emotional memory in your travel bag. I remember where I came from and how I became a human, why I hung around, and now my final departure is scheduled. This way out. Escaping velocity. Not just eternity, but infinity."- thin boy on the roof.
*I plagiarized Dave Eggers because I love that fucking book of the same name. You should look into it.
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